Oh, you young’uns with your fancy phones and your internets! Always lookin’ up this and that. Today, you’re askin’ about the most expensive cheeses in the world? Well, I tell ya, back in my day, cheese was cheese. We didn’t have no hundred different kinds like you got now.
But I heard tell of some cheeses, cost more than a new dress! More than a whole pig even! Can you believe that? Cheese! It’s just milk that’s gone a bit funny, ain’t it?
Now, this one, they call it… Pule. Sounds like somethin’ you’d call a sick cat, don’t it? This Pule cheese, it ain’t cheap. I heard it’s the world’s most expensive cheese. They say it comes from Serbia. Serbia! Where’s that, even? Must be far, far away, across the big water.
This Pule, it’s made from donkey milk. Donkey milk! Now, I’ve had goat milk, cow milk, even sheep milk once. But donkey? That’s a new one. And they mix it up with goat milk too, 60% donkey, 40% goat. Makes your head spin, don’t it?
They say this Pule cheese costs… are you sittin’ down? They say it can be $600 a pound! Six hundred! For a little bit of cheese! Lord have mercy. You could buy a whole herd of chickens for that kinda money. I heard it even goes up to $1,000 a pound sometimes. I don’t know who would pay that much, but they must be richer than a king.
- That Pule, it comes from a special place. A reserve, they call it. Zasavica, or somethin’ like that. Fancy name.
- Donkey milk is what makes it so special, they say. Must be some special donkeys.
- They don’t make a whole lot of it, I reckon. That’s why it’s so pricey.
Then there’s another one, called… Lord of the Hundreds. Lord of the Hundreds! What a name. Sounds like some big shot, don’t he? This one’s from a place called East Sussex. Now where in tarnation is that? Must be ‘nother one of them faraway places. Only $45 a pound for that one. Still a lot if you ask me.
And get this – there’s cheese made from moose milk! Moose! Them big fellas with the antlers. They call it Algost. Now, I seen a moose once, down by the creek. Big, scary thing. Can’t imagine milkin’ one of them. But I hear it costs about $500 a pound. 500 dollars! For cheese! You could feed a whole family for a month on that kinda money.
I heard there’s a whole list of these fancy cheeses. Ten of ’em, maybe more. The most expensive cheese in the world, they call them. I don’t know who’s keepin’ track of all that. They say there’s 15 of them fancy cheeses, and most folks ain’t never even heard of them.
I reckon rich folks like to eat things that no one else can get. Makes ’em feel special, I suppose. Me, I’m happy with a good ol’ piece of cheddar. You know, the kind you get down at the general store. Not this expensive cheese. Doesn’t taste like money, I bet.
These fancy cheeses, they ain’t like the cheese we used to make. We’d just milk the cow, let it sit, and there you have it. Cheese. Didn’t need no donkeys, no moose, no fancy names. And certainly not hundreds of dollars for a pound! These most expensive cheeses are just somethin’ else.
But I guess if you got the money, you can buy whatever you want. Even cheese that costs more than a car. It’s a crazy world, ain’t it? Just remember, young’uns, the best things in life ain’t always the most expensive. Sometimes, they’re the simplest. Like a good piece of cheese, made with love, not with donkey milk that costs a fortune.
Now, I think I’ll go have me a slice of that cheddar. And maybe a biscuit. All this talk of cheese has made me hungry. You kids and your expensive cheese. You can keep your Pule and your Algost. I’ll stick to what I know. It might not be the most expensive cheese in the world, but it tastes just fine to me.
